Week 25 - I'm a Momma!

I stayed in Bacolod for three days waiting for my trainee so I spent New Years there. Well- my new years, for the first time since probably I was a toddler, I slept for the new year. Kind of sad, but Bacolod sure didn't sleep. They were VERY awake and VERY loud. As in- SO LOUD. Ambulances driving up and down the street just to be loud, banging pots, fireworks, screaming- the whole works. It was totally ridiculous only because I was trying to sleep hahaha. So I did technically wake up at midnight only to tell myself happy new years and try to go back to sleep.

My week was pretty amazing!! The three days I spent in Bacolod, I was companions with one of my old STL's and we just loved every second. We had so much fun together and really worked hard. She, also was training so we were waiting for our trainees to arrive that Thursday, so what we did was work in her area. She is actually opening an area in Bacolod so I got to experience that a little bit- on how to open up an area. It was awesome. The members are so strong there and we found lots of people and referals to teach.

And then!!! Thursday came!! At this point, I was super nervous because I just didn't know if I was ready to be training a new, filipino missionary, when I still feel new myself. But- we met and I LOVE HER!! She's seriously the BEST. Like seriously. She's so obedient, so so sweet, super smart, hardworking, and super fun. We are having a blast while I am teaching her Ilonggo and she is teaching me Tagalog(: She speaks english pretty well so if all other communication fails, we can always fall back on English. So no problems there. But she is super humble and teachable so she lets me speak in Hiligaynon and then tries to speak it herself also. I love it. I feel like a tutor especially in language study, and it's fun to be the one who knows lots for the first time(: It really has shown me that I know the language better than I thought I did. I have had multiple people here call me fluent which is always fun to hear that all my hard work is paying off. But yeah. Here on the mission, trainers are called "moms" and the trainees are called "children" so I am officially a mom!! At 19!! Hahaha but it's fun.

I totally had a humbling moment the first day we were working together. It sounds kind of cheesy but its real. I was praying and just kind of pouring out my heart to Heavenly Father that I am nervous to train her because I want to be the best trainer and all of a sudden the feeling came into my mind that "Whoa. I feel like a real mom. I understand the feeling I've heard of when moms hold their newborns and are so scared to mess this little innocent child up." So yeah- I totally had a mom moment. I told Heavenly Father that I am totally scared to mess this gorgeous, new, innocent missionary up. That I want her to stay pure and want her to keep the fire in her heart for this work, and I don't want to be the reason she loses that. But as days go by, I gain more and more comfort from Him that I am doing right. I am doing everything I am supposed to be and He is blessing me for it. We have had a really successful past days full of working hard and finding new people to teach. I love it. I am going to be totally sad when we split. I already have a heart FULL of love for Sister Tagpuno, my child(:

The only sad news I have is that JamJam, the child we tried to baptize two weeks ago, told us yesterday that she has no desire to ever get baptized. I talked all about the importance of baptism and confirmation and immersion, and she made the final decision that she doesn't want to. So that broke my heart. Sister Tagpuno right after said "I can see how devastated you are." It really is a hard part of missionary work. To see someone get so close to salvation and then turn back. It's hard. But I promised JamJam that when she grows older, and she understands the importance of baptism by immersion, she will want to get baptized. I felt the Spirit in our lesson and even though it broke my heart, I felt comfort that the Lord has perfect timing for everything, so I need not worry. So now, we are focusing on finding and being guided to people who are prepared. For that is what this work is about(:

As for my sickness and all that, I am all recovered and no issues there(: So happy day. I am so happy. I love this work. I love God's plan for me and His children. And I love being exactly obedient. It's the best for real. I am sooo grateful for this opportunity to be trusted enough with an innocent, new missionary so that I can train her how to be the best missionary. And I love being humbled to my knees time and time again, reminded that I can't do this life alone. I need my Savior and I need my Heavenly Father. And I am so grateful they are here for me.

I love y'all. I miss y'all. And I hope this new year brings the best of memories to all.

Sister Robertson

Sunset Selfie

my GORGEOUS new companion and some elders who got in our shot

a family in bacolod that i got super close with in two days and they said they hope i get assigned there one day!

Why I never want to leave Sipalay